A While
by Yuu-Pon
Summary: Several years have passed since the defeat of the Earl and the clan of Noah. The order has dispersed and Bookman and Lavi have decided to do the same. Without saying good-bye to anyone, Lavi packs up and leaves.
1. Chapter 1

Several years had passed since the defeat of the Earl as well as the clan of Noah, and the Black Order had become a very quiet place. Allen had been taken the central head quarters once he was unneeded, and the other exorcists rarely heard from him, getting a letter or two around the holidays. Once or twice he, along with Link, wandering into the order in the middle of the night, sleeping in Allen's room. They would leave after breakfast, saying that they had completed their mission and were only passing though.

Most of the scientists had left the organization and only a few remained, who spent their time making useless potions and robots like Komui used to do. Many of the finders went back to their home, but continued to be loyal to the order, searching for pieces of innocence in their cities and alerting the headquarters of any akuma that managed to survive the destruction the clan of Noah.

Lenalee still helped her brother in the office, bringing him his coffee whenever he asked. She rarely went on missions any more, staying close to her brother, who actually began to search for someone for her to date, wanting her to be happy, even though he'd have to 'give her away' to a man. Kanda had taken to reading books, spending his free time sitting in the library with dusty books that told of ancient battles and myths. He and Lavi would often talk about them. Kanda would almost always get lost halfway through the conversation.

Several day's following Kanda's twenty-fifth birthday, he sat in the cafeteria silently eating his order of soba. He sighed and looked around the empty room, nobody was left to annoy him besides Lavi, and with the disappearance of everyone, he'd begun to enjoy the company more than he used to, rather than finding it annoying. It happened soon after Allen left, along with Krory, Miranda and a few other exorcists who relocated to other branches in the order. It was a boring place and everything, including the people in it, had begun to get coated in dust.

Lenalee ran into the cafeteria , her eyes teary and her cheeks rosy. She stopped in front of Kanda's table.

"Kanda! You have to stop them, Bookman and Lavi are leaving!" She said frantically, rubbing her eyes trying to get the tears to stop. Kanda dropped his chopsticks, which fell to the table with a clatter, one rolling off of the table and on to the floor with a soft clink. He looked at her wide-eyed and cursed under his breath.

Lavi was leaving. Kanda didn't know why he expected him to say, he knew all along that one day he'd leave. Lavi had no choice in the matter, and maybe he wanted to leave. Kanda wondered if he even considered them friends. He sat there stunned for what seemed to be an eternity, everything around him moving slowly as he thought of what to do, he barely heard Lenalee talking beside him as he fixed his gaze on the swirls in the wooden table.

Kanda bit his bottom lip in thought. Standing slowly, Kanda walked past Lenalee as casually as he could, attempting to keep his hurt feelings inside as he walked from the room. Once he was sure he was out of her sight, Kanda ran out of the order as fast as his legs could carry him. Kanda hoped Lavi hadn't gotten too far as he slowed to catch his breath. He realized the years of sitting around had made his abilities weaken, and he made a mental note to start training more often. Kanda ran down the cracked dirt road that lead to town, as he drew closer to town, Kanda saw the familiar head of short, red hair walking beside the stubby old man. He stopped running and smiled a bit, glad to have caught up to him.

"Lavi! You fucking asshole!" He yelled, the brief smile now gone. Lavi spun around at the familiar voice. He back tracked and smiled at Kanda.

"Huh…Yuu, what is it?" Lavi asked, walking up to Kanda despite Bookman's protests. He smiled like he wasn't leaving forever and Kanda looked down. The thought of him leaving and the idea that Lavi couldn't care less made Kanda cringe, though he would never admit it.

"Can't you at least say 'good-bye'? You made Lenalee cry…you idiot. Did you say good-bye to anyone? I know there's barely anybody left in the order, but there are a lot of people who would've liked to know you were leaving for good." Kanda said quietly, which Lavi found weird, he'd never seen the other act this way. Lavi laughed a bit, a weak laugh that told Kanda it didn't really matter. Kanda felt a pain in his chest, realizing Lavi probably was acting the entire time they knew each other. Kanda shut his eyes tightly and tried to push the thought from his mind.

"Tell her 'I'm sorry and good-bye' for me, okay? Is there something else wrong, Yuu? You ran down here, you're out of breath and you aren't threatening me because I used your name or anything. Why's that?" Lavi asked, attempting to change the subject, knowing exactly what Kanda was thinking. It wasn't like he could tell Kanda then and there that he love him, Bookman was standing a few feet away after all.

"I'm surprised you haven't noticed, or maybe you did and chose not to say anything, and if you haven't then you're an idiot." Kanda replied, hoping he wouldn't have to explain it. He didn't want to have to force those words out of his throat. They'd probably make him stutter and babble on as he tried to find the courage to say them. Kanda mentally scolded himself at the idea, him rambling on as he tried to say something so simple. Bookman said something about waiting for Lavi at the train station and Lavi waved to him to say he acknowledged the statement. He sighed and turned his attention back to Kanda.

"I don't follow, I guess I am an idiot. Care to explain why you don't want me to go?" Lavi asked, genuinely unsure about the older's statement.

"Well, you see…I don't know how to say this. I've never said it before. Not once in my life. I probably sound like an idiot now, because I can't even say three simple words. And those words should be easy to say, right? That's what I've heard anyways. I don't get how people can say it so easily, I think if you say it too much then the words don't mean as much after some time. I uh…I'm just going to come out and say it then. Please don't leave….I love you, Lavi" Kanda said, babbling on, like he predicted, as he tried to get to the point. His cheeks flushed a light shade of pink as he finished his ramble. Kanda looked up at Lavi slowly, hoping he wouldn't get laughed at or something similar. Lavi looked at him confused for what seemed like a matter of minutes to Kanda.

"Yuu, I don't know what to say. You're asking me to abandon my position and stay with you." Lavi replied after some time.

"Bookman said I was going to be ready after this fall. You can't just say something like that, which is clearly a lie, and expect me to believe it and stay here. What kind of idiot do you think I am? I know you hate me, you've made it quite obvious over the past few years." Lavi said with a blank expression on his face. The lack of expression made Kanda want to turn on his heels and leave as fast as he could. Yet, he stayed put, hoping for the best. He might end up watching the one he had fallen so utterly and deeply in love with, walk away from him, forever. Or, he could walk, hand in hand, with him back to the half-empty building he had come to call home.

"You don't believe me?" Kanda asked, baffled. "I know I'm not the greatest at expressing my feelings. But you don't know how many times I tried to say it to you over the years! How many times I've wanted to kiss you when you called me 'Yuu' and how many times I've wanted to hug you when you came home from missions alive." Kanda said, looking down so Lavi wouldn't see the hurt expression on his face.

"I'll believe you if you do something to make me believe you, but do it in the next minute or I'll have to leave, my train leaves soon." He said, looking bored with the situation. To him the confession of sorts was only a way to get him to stay, and it was obvious that there was no way in hell that the long-haired exorcist had the same feelings for him. Kanda couldn't believe how Lavi was acting, but he guessed he'd dropped the charade and was acting like himself, or maybe his new alias.

Kanda nodded and stepped close to Lavi, clearing the distance in a few steps. He cupped Lavi's cheeks in his hands and brought their lips close as he looked into Lavi's one visible eye for a moment. Kanda pressed his lips again the other's gently, not wanting to offend Lavi with the rough, tongue battle off a kiss he'd always wanted to give him. Kanda continued to kiss the wide-eyed Lavi, who, up until that point was only joking about proving it. Kanda slowly let go of Lavi's face and wrapped his arms around him to keep him from moving away.

After a few moments, Lavi snapped out of his daze and kissed him back, sliding his hands into Kanda's back pockets, pulling him closer. The two stayed like this for minutes, kissing each other gently, eventually getting rougher as time went on. Kanda reluctantly pulled back and smiled weakly at the red-head.

"I love you too." Lavi said as he pulled Kanda back in for another kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

The two stayed in that position for a while, Lavi slowly deepening the kiss they shared to the point where he bit Kanda's lower lip, asking for permission to let his tongue enter. Kanda complied, opening his mouth slightly to let him in. Lavi pulled him close as he slid his tongue into the older's mouth. He let his tongue explore the new warmth, prodding Kanda's tongue first, then simply running the muscle over everything it could reach. Kanda brought his tongue to meet Lavi's twirling his own around the intruding muscle. Lavi moved himself closer, pressing his body to Kanda's so there was barely any space between them.

Kanda was the first to pull away, a long strand of saliva connecting them. His face dark red, partly out of embarrassment and partly because he was slightly hard. He attempted to hide it, he'd never had a kiss like that with anybody before and it was not something he wanted to tell Lavi. Though, by the smug look that was on Lavi's face, it was obvious that he could tell.

"I'm betting you're a virgin, Yuu-Chan~" Lavi said, adding chan to add emphasis on how childish he found it to be. A twenty-five year old virgin, was that even possible? Kanda stayed silent, making the answer a definite yes. Lavi smirked and leaned in to look at Kanda, who hung his head slightly.

"Answer the question, Yuu...have you ever fucked anybody?" Lavi asked, half grinning and half smirking now. "Has anyone every touched your body that way? I bet you haven't even touched yourself that way. Pathetic..." He continued, smirking completely as he spoke.

"Why? Are you planning on changing the answer? Because...I mean...you can...but you have to go with Bookman and leave me alone. So, go catch your train and I probably won't see you around. So this is good-bye." He said softly. It was so uncharacteristic of Kanda to be so emotionally open and it confused Lavi to an extreme. He wondered if Kanda loved his that much that he'd actually stop being the generic stick up the ass kind of guy. But Lavi wasn't sure if he was willing to abandon everything he'd ever wanted for something he'd craved for the better part of two years. Lavi wondered if Kanda was worth becoming at least a little bit more normal. He looked around nervously, Kanda expected an answer, didn't he? Kanda couldn't expect him to give him an answer that second, it was too late to stop, he and Bookman were one of the few Bookmen still living. Lavi looked at his ex-comrade to the ground and back again.

"Bookman is waiting Yuu...but I don't want to go. Part of me wants to stay and part wants to leave you behind. I'm not 'Lavi' anymore, and becoming the least bit normal again would be impossible. I don't know anything about myself so how am I supposed to act? Bookman is forever old and I'm probably the last person he'll ever teach. The old panda is the oldest in the clan, Yuu...I can't let him go without a final say. I mean, I love you, I assume its love because I've never been able to love before you. Yuu...I don't know what to do anymore...I love you so much, so so much and I don't ever want to go."

"Then don't go...or, we can both go away from that grotesque place filled with annoying idiots. We can run away together, won't that be nice. We can go to Germany or maybe Australia. Please...don't go...I can't lose someone else I care about."


End file.
